“WTF is a Greggs.” This was a tweet I read this week from a cycling fan, who clearly didn’t live in the UK, and it made me chuckle to myself.
It’s a fair question, actually. To help out, others leapt to answer it. “Only the best place in the world,” one person wrote. “It’s actually elite,” another said. The most succinct definition I saw was as such: “It’s a national chain of bakeries in the UK, but in truth, it’s so much more.”
I know what you’re thinking: why is someone mansplaining Greggs to me on a cycling website? Again, a fair question. Well, on Monday morning, for a brief moment in time, Britain’s beloved bakery merged worlds with that of elite-level cycling, and the scene was magnificent.
Allow me to describe it to you. Shared on X by Soudal Quick-Step, there’s a photo that shows two-time world champion Julian Alaphilippe readying himself before stage one of the Tour of Britain . He’s clipped into his pedal with his left foot, holds one hand on the bars, and the other on his brake lever. Over both of his shoulders, emblazoned in bold, white text, the Greggs logo frames his helmeted skull. It looks as if – and this is what Twitter has chosen to believe – the Frenchman has just raided the pastry shelves.
“This is art,” commented the official Greggs account. I, personally, can’t help but agree. In years to come, critics will look back on this photo, a priceless race artifact, a fusion of high-end sport and high-street retail, and talk at length about the dichotomy of the two worlds. In reality, they are closer than they seem.
That’s right, Greggs and cycling are actually closely aligned. Many of us cyclists rely on the bakery for a quick, and crucially cheap, calorie hit when we’re out on our rides. Last year, my girlfriend bought me a £20 Greggs gift card for my birthday (among other things, don’t worry), which guaranteed me a filling flow of vegan sausage rolls.
There’s actually a Greggs kiosk inside the giant Asda outside British Cycling’s Manchester HQ. Riders at this year’s National Track Championships visited it for their pre- and post-race nutrition, with one telling me the chain’s steak bake was the perfect stomach settler .
So line your belly, Loulou. There are two days remaining of the Tour of Britain, and with a host of Greggs stores in both Northampton and Felixstowe, I’ll be disappointed if I don’t see queues out the door.
1. Trust a Frenchman to start his day at the boulangerie
2. It’s two for one at Soudal Quick-Step – Remco Evenepoel filled his jersey pockets, too
3. If you’re wondering who we have to thank for this content, it’s Phil Lowe, Soudal Quick-Step’s communications manager and fellow Greggs aficionado
4. It’s not just bakeries at the Tour of Britain. Here’s the British national champion outside of one of his country’s biggest institutions
5. Team GB’s Archie Atkinson can win Paralympic medals, but can he eat a whole muffin in one mouthful?
6. Now we go from muffin-eaters to Beefeaters. I hope Remco Evenepoel got to hear his ‘hardstyle’ tunes
7. There’s been a glitch in the Matrix
8. Either Grace Brown has become confused by what ‘Team GB’ is, or David Beckham has a favourite Australian time trialist
9. A Strava notification pings on your phone. Your KOM crown has been stolen. You look to see who took it, and your face drops when you spot it’s a fella (Lachlan Morton, to be fair) on a 500km ride
10. Watch until the end for the twist
11. Shorts and short sleeves in the rain? They’re made different in Yorkshire
12. This ultra-rider bumped into Geraint Thomas on a ride, and left with a fistful of gels for proof
13. Step aside UAE Team Emirates
14. And finally, here’s some warming, fatherly advice from Primož Roglič
